I seem to have acquired an irritating roommate out of nowhere. His name is Fly A. Every time I go into a room he seems to be there, buzzing (possibly like a fridge or a detuned radio). He even followed me to the bathroom the other day. He keeps inviting his friend Fly B (or it may be Geoffrey) around without asking me. At least I think it’s another fly, they all look the same to me (I hope that doesn’t sound racist). He also seems to have no inclination to pay his share of the utilities, even though he never turns the lights off or closes the fridge. I have a suspicion he’s thinking about taking up the tuba. Anyway, I have tried playing loud music, cooking Indian food, all the usual tricks to get rid of an unwanted house guest, but nothing seems to work. I even tried chasing him around the house with a blender (former roommates of mine will no doubt recall this habit) to no avail. So what I want to know is, are there any humane ways of trapping a fly such that I can then release it outside? I think its time to move on, and I’m sure I can catch up with him via his Flyspace page after the summer.


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