My diagnosis

I’ve suffered from depression since I was around 12 or 13, but I’ve always felt that that was more of a symptom rather than a cause. Since I’ve been in the mental health system (last 6 or 7 years) I’ve developed a sort of diagnosis obsession. Well not an obsession exactly, but I really think it would help me to have a diagnosis. A few months ago I got a diagnosis, then I saw a specialist who promptly overturned it. Here are a few things I’ve been diagnosed then undiagnosed with over the years

Melancholic depression

Borderline Personality Disorder (this was the most recent one)

Treatment Resistant depression

Type II bipolar disorder

Social phobia

Nobody’s ever been able to agree on any diagnosis except the infamous NOS. This means ‘not otherwise specified’. So my diagnosis now is a sort of collection of symptoms from various things, none of which really help me too much. Major depressive disorder with personality disorder NOS, obsessive-compulsive tendencies NOS with a side of social anxiety, on whole wheat bread with no hot peppers please.

I do enjoy being an individual, but sometimes it would be nice to fit into a category.

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